Over You

To the person who left me and asked me if I’m over him,

 

I don’t know how to say this. I’m over you. I know I shouldn’t be, but I am. I am not broken and it’s not because I didn’t truly love you. No, I did love you with everything I had, but it’s just that I’m good at fixing myself and forgetting everything that hurt me like an old song that I don’t like to hear anymore.

 

When people leave I get over them pretty soon, even before the wounds they give me heals. You think of me as heartless but I am not. I have this little heart which used to pump blood, and now it pumps pain. I can hardly bear it myself. And the scar you left on my heart, I don’t think it will ever heal, but that in no way mean that I’ll miss you, or love you still.

 

I thought it shouldn’t bother you, now that you have left, but I think my getting over you is bothering you more than the fact that you left me is bothering me. Am I speaking clearly? Do you understand what I’m trying to say? If not, it’s not your fault. My mind works in this very way. Sometimes even I cannot figure out the things I say.

 

Anyway I have myself convinced that you were a nightmare dressed in love and I don’t need you in my life anymore. I am so over you. I don’t even remember your name. Our infinity was a small one. And you can go and fuck yourself now.

 

~ Chahna Tank  | Edited by Afreen Zeb

 


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