Ode to The Average Girl
I’m in love. I am.
The woman not so fair, definitely not the dreamy kind that one may find in a beauty commercial, or one that would pose with oomph on movie posters; yet she has me thinking about her with indescribable longing.
She is short, skinny, chubby, a shade approaching peach, dark, has a pair of thick glasses, braces, facial hair, pimples, double chin, thin hair, flaky skin, flabby arms and another few iniquities. All that said and perceived, I can’t help but think of her with spirited adoration, that woman. It is as difficult as it may be to explain the disposition of a bee towards flowers… all it is or may be the law of my being.
My fiber responds to beauty in its pristine fashion. Please note that I’m not asking her to not be presentable. Please be. But not an inch further than that. The moment she goes beyond presentable, she jumps down a layer to those brilliant faces devoid of humanness and womanhood that are close to ceramic decorations on the wall than what should exist above the neck. It’s nice to look at and admire. Maybe that is the reason women do it… Maybe the reason women do it is because men haven’t responded otherwise. All that results is real beauty being sealed away. Superficial beauty, beauty concerned with or comprehending only what is apparent or obvious; not deep or penetrating emotionally or intellectually. I shun the idea of superficial beauty. But one does fall at times for the charm that grips the fleeting feelings of the heart. Maybe that is the strength of such superficial beauty; enchant visually, please aesthetically.
Good looks are like winning a lottery. It’s a gamble of the genes the father and mother share. One’s chance of getting one is slim to none. But our human nature is such that it doesn’t let us be satisfied with what we have. We need better. We demand and aspire to imitate or reach to the ones that possess it. If only we realized, we were liked either way.
A woman, how much ever beautiful, is only beautiful for a certain prime in life. I have no reservations in speaking that no human being is truly flawless; there is always something that will not be as one would want it to be. But then again, she’s like a piece of art to each that perceives her, good or bad depends on the one who perceives. The Master took efforts and time for all.
So if a woman fails to captivate me with ‘beauty,’ what does she captivate me with? What empowers her to demand my attention to her presence?
Though it took some time to iterate, I came up with the reasons that still grow strongly on me, every day. The reasons for any girl to unlock the secret mysteries of my undivided attention.
The reasons: a girl’s tongue and her approach to living which are extensions to the antonym of superficial beauty; emotional maturity and intellectual beauty. Girls who lack these are like those sentences without grammar or substance. And I’m afraid, for in these times they are mighty plenty, those sentences.
So as I said, emotional maturity and intellectual beauty with ease… But truth has it that those words scale deeper than the Pacific bed. Not an item that one gets abundantly, everywhere. They are very refined, qualitative terms. The things that we are in control to a certain extent, unlike physical beauty!
Let me come up with a brief explanation of the terms and then I shall try to project an idea of why it is essential for all. Emotional maturity: the emotional stability that one observes over different scenarios and times in life. In simpler words, it would be the capacity to control emotions with resilience and a calm demeanor.
A lot can be said about someone who exudes a high level of emotional maturity. The crisis of the age is that it is unstable with emotions and feelings. Everything wrong under the sky to the human heart can be boiled down to this; the incapacity to control emotions and feelings.
Let us not digress further lest it became too serious on which ‘Ode to the average girl’ is not about.
The next qualitative term is intellectual beauty. It is the quality of the mind (mind you, not the brain) that one possesses. But how does one know what intellectual beauty is? I conjured a perception to recognize the level of intellectual beauty. It can be perceived through the words one uses to describe one’s thoughts which extends to one’s actions using a particular body language in a daily routine.
Summing up everything in a single sentence isn’t justified for that term. So I urge readers to feel free to explore their own ideas. My statement has some keywords that I deem are important. These are what give away a lady’s intellectual beauty to me: the type of words she uses, the kind of thoughts she has, the body language she uses to commit an action, and most of all the combination of these in a daily routine.
Here is the catch.
I may have segregated both emotional maturity and intellectual beauty while explaining, but if one notices keenly, they are strands of the same thread, woven together. If she has emotional maturity, she has intellectual beauty. Of course, vice versa holds true too.
Now, any girl can have these qualities, but then why is this essay favoring the average girl? I reckon this entire composition would be pointless otherwise.
The average girl is a social stigma amidst the good-looking. I speak that with utmost seriousness. She needs her pack of beauty products, face masks, masquerades to keep up with the ones around her, accessories to make her not feel naked when she presents herself to a group that she might not even like in the first place. Her confidence is weak otherwise. She relies on these more than her character. She knows what is socially accepted as a guarantee. She assumes that her character stands the possibility of a test, and the fear of being denied of acceptance. What if she makes a fool of herself? These words may seem louder than what it may seem on the inside. But, forgive me for I couldn’t find any other way of putting them.
And that is where the secret lines of change lie. That is where she might find the crossroad. She has two inevitable options. One of which is to go with the flow and try harder each time to change herself into the ceramic decoration on the wall and be admired by all for her looks. Chances are that she might get lost in the highs that compliments provide, as she craves for more to a point she realizes, that she isn’t receiving the adoration she was receiving.
Second of which is a choice of conscience. She can choose to recognize that this entire charade of superficial beauty and admiration is only skin deep. The choice of understanding that without the looks she is considered nothing but a plain shrub, nothing special and nothing different. Only people who have looked up to her may know how special she may be. But alas! She may not find any of those sorts in these circles.
And she humbles herself.
Then begins the journey to emotional maturity and intellectual beauty. She grows and grows with situations and circumstances. She realizes that she is better than pretending hard to be something she is not. She tries to be genuine with her feelings. She conducts herself the best possible way she can. She knows her limits. In time, a strong character is born.
A girl that I admire is born.
That is why this ode is to the average girl, because she struggles.
For the readers’ minds that pace much faster than mine, realize that I have no reservations against the born-beautiful. They are brilliant expressions of the Maker. But one must know that the beautiful are cursed. The world softens them with its adoration and praises, makes it easy for them to fall prey to the antics of this world.
I read in a book that this world’s logic was founded on the laws of attraction; I then realized that I had just found another dumb way to begin a beautiful Monday.
~ Jeswin M Varghese | Edited by Nandini
Image source: pixabay.com